One Month

One month ago I got my tattoo.

Isn't it funny that the month I permanently brand my flesh with the word of God I want to abandon my faith? 

Yes, it's fucking hilarious.

But in this attitude of bewilderment at God, feeling lost in the abyss of broken grey that smothers our world, wanting to scream out the words of Christ on the cross, I feel peace in knowing that the flesh on my right shoulder will never return to the uniform pink it once was.  

It is much more complicated than that. 

I am thankful. 
God has fenced me in.

I am forced to sigh in my spirit and know that God is. 

It is I

" [God says,] 'It is I' that is to say, 'It is I: the power and goodness of fatherhood. It is I: the wisdom of motherhood. It is I: the light and the grace which is all blessed love. It is I: the Trinity. It is I: the unity. I am the soverign goodness of all manner of things. It is I that make you love. It is I that make you long. It is I: the eternal fulfillment of all true desires."
-Julian of Norwich