Isn't it funny that the month I permanently brand my flesh with the word of God I want to abandon my faith?
Yes, it's fucking hilarious.
But in this attitude of bewilderment at God, feeling lost in the abyss of broken grey that smothers our world, wanting to scream out the words of Christ on the cross, I feel peace in knowing that the flesh on my right shoulder will never return to the uniform pink it once was.
It is much more complicated than that.
I am thankful.
God has fenced me in.
God has fenced me in.
I am forced to sigh in my spirit and know that God is.
beautiful. my sister quoted Anne Lammott on her blog today, and this one made me think of you.
ReplyDelete“why couldn’t Jesus command us to obsess about everything, to try to control and manipulate people, to try not to breathe at all, or to pay attention, stomp away to brood when people annoy us, and then eat a big bag of Hershey’s kisses in bed?”
wouldn't that make everything easier?
don't lose heart, my dearest Lara. you are so inspiring to me and to others around you. keep on loving, keep on living.
i love you.